In talks with said ardent Beta reader, she expressed that she liked how I described my male lead. When I asked about other characters, she was fairly spot on for all but the female lead. She got that she was tall but thought she was dainty.
Troubling since yes, Nance is tall but she’s also fairly broad shouldered with large hands (and feet). So now, I’m back in some earlier chapters sprinkling things in.
As I’ve said before, description isn’t my strong suit (dialog all day), plus the story is in varying 3rd. I don’t like doing info dumps of description, so I do it from who ever is in charge of the ‘camera’ in that scene.
Ikher’s a genuinely good person, so he says that Janine has ample curves. Where as Candace calls her a fat bitch. Ikher notices how Nancy’s hands are larger than his when she hands his cup back or how, once he sees her in regular clothes, she is bustier than her tracksuit let on. Elias, on the other hand, finds Nancy’s broad shoulders off putting but meets her because he’s ‘always wanted to see her tits’.
Doing it this way makes you wait a bit to get the full picture, but it’s hopefully a little more immersive. Now to figure out how to phrase this stuff without being too nice or straying into /menwritingwomen territory.
Back at it. Thanks for reading! ^_^
